Religion: Care For The Aged

The responsibility for care of the aged is gradually shifting to the state. Care of the aged represents a heavy burden on the national economy. However much a state is ready to spend, it can never buy them peace and contentment. The most terrible feeling of having been rejected, left out and abandoned, and the most painful realisation of a growing void of loneliness within, are problems beyond the reach of many to resolve.

To consider that a comparatively remote relative would ever be taken care of by the rest of the family has become almost impossible to imagine. In such societies, the need for homes for the aged grows with the passage of time. Yet, it is not always possible for a state to apportion enough money to provide for them even the minimum requirements of a decent life.

Physical ailments are much easier to cure or alleviate, but the deep psychological traumas from which a considerable number of elderly members of modern societies are suffering, are far more difficult to treat. In predominantly Muslim countries, however much values may have deteriorated, this condition, which prevails in the rest of contemporary society, is unthinkable.

It is considered a disgrace and dishonour for the old and aged to be treated with such disrespect and callousness. It is a matter of shame for most Muslims to hand over the responsibilities of elderly relatives to the state even if the state is willing to look after them. As such, the role of a Muslim woman amidst her home and family is far from over with the coming of age of the children.

She remains deeply bonded to the past as well as to the future. It is her kind and humane concern, and her innate ability to look after those who stand in need of care, which comes to the rescue of the older members of society. They remain as precious and respected as before and continue to be integral members of the family.

The mother plays a major part in looking after them and providing them with her company, not as drudgery and tedium, but as a live natural expression of human kinship. Thus, when she grows older she can rest assured that such a society will not eject her nor leave her abandoned as a relic of the past. Of course, there are exceptions in every society; and there are old remnants of the past considered as tiresome burdens in some Muslim families living under the influences of the modern trends. But on the whole, Muslim societies are relatively free of homes for abandoned parents unlike other societies.

This reminds me of a joke, which may make some people laugh yet move, some others to tears. Once a child observed, with much pain and unease, the ill treatment of his grandfather at the hands of his father. He was gradually transferred from a well-provided and comfortable main bedroom to smaller and less convenient accommodation until it was finally decided to remove the grandfather to the servant’s quarters. During an exceptionally severe winter, the grandfather complained of his room being too chilly and his quilt being too thin to make him feel warm and comfortable.

The father started looking for an extra blanket from a stock of old, useless rags. Observing this, the child turned to his father and requested: ‘Please do not give all the rags to grandpa. Keep some for me so that I may be able to give them to you when you grow old.’ In this innocent expression of a child’s displeasure is concentrated all the agony of the older generation in modern times.

In Muslim societies, it is as rare to find such exceptions, as it is rare and becoming more rare to find exceptions in modern societies amongst relatives in their treatment of the old. Muslims are taught:

Thy Lord has commanded, “Worship none but Him, and show kindness to parents. If one of them or both of them attain old age with thee, never say unto them any word expressive of disgust nor reproach them, but address them with excellent speech.

“And lower to them the wing of humility out of tenderness. And say, ‘My Lord, have mercy on them even as they nourished me in my childhood.’” [Holy Quran, 17:24-25]


[Extract from the book Islam's Response To Contemporary Issues by His Holiness Mirza Tahir Ahmad]



The Ahmadiyya Post, Religion. Sept 24, 2011